My Personal “What the Hell?” Day

Today I have found myself asking “What the hell?” so many times. I cannot quite put into words the way I’ve been feeling today, but it has been constant and I am in such a craptastic mood and I am sick of feeling down. What the hell?

Every little thing today has pissed me off… did I just wake up on the wrong side of the bed and have my emotions just blow up? Well if that is not the reason I do not know what is. My fuse has been so incredibly short today- I feel like everyone I have come into contact with has to walk on eggshells. And this might sound a little jacked… but I would not have it any other way. I am sick of feeling like nobody gives a shit what I think, and nobody respects my opinion. It has been proven over and over the past few days.

Today I really wish I had my own place. This might be one of the reasons I am so angry with the world. We have been suffering for so long… the bad economy has really raped us over the last two years. My wonderful husband finally found a job after a year of job searching. Isn’t job hunting supposed to be easier when you have a degree with a specific field in mind? I know this is not true, no matter what kind of college education you have… if your community is suffering from a recession you have a long hard bumpy road in front of you when you are job hunting. I am happy that he finally has a place where we can receive a steady income. It is just the waiting to live on our own part that is taking the toll on me. I’ve never gotten to experience this… I am a young mother. I never lived as an adult with responsibilities until my daughter was born.

Having my own place is something I have wanted for such a long time. Is it too much to ask to have a place where it is my own and I do not have to worry about being in the way or being intrusive.

I want to have a place that is 100% my own. Private. A sanctuary.

What the hell.

Comments

  1. Candace says:

    No advice only hugs! I had a what the hell day myself! We don’t have 100% sanctuary either so you are not alone!
    .-= Candace´s last blog ..http://serendipitymommy.com/misc/just-one-of-those-days/“ rel=”nofollow”>Just One Of Those Days =-.

  2. Monique says:

    Sorry you’re having one of those days. Me and my 2 daughters lived with family for 6 months, so I know what you’re feeling. Now, my mom has lived with us for almost a year. Tomorrow’s a new day. I hope it can get better for you, sooner rather than later.

  3. I’m so sorry it’s been so hard on you. It would be difficult not having a place of your own. I hope things look up for you soon and you are able to get a place.

    Hopefully tomorrow will be better. Sending you positive thoughts.
    .-= Tired Mom Tésa´s last blog ..http://www.2wired2tired.com/what-do-you-see“ rel=”nofollow”>What Do You See? =-.

  4. NinaSay says:

    Thanks so much. It really is hard when you do not have a home that is 100% yours.

    I think every momma deserves a sanctuary of their own.

  5. NinaSay says:

    Thank you!
    Unfortunately (so embarrassing) DH and I have lived with each set of in-laws (3 all together) we have been named NPA for no permanent address.

    Lovely right? LOL

  6. NinaSay says:

    Thanks so much. As simple as your comment is… hearing things like that really make me feel better. I am one of those people who just reassurance sometimes.

    :)

  7. Monique says:

    Yeah, I definitely know how it feels. Will you be able to afford your own place anytime soon? As in – do you have an end date in sight to look forward to? I wish there was some way I could help you feel better.
    .-= Monique´s last blog ..http://armsofasister.com/2010/04/24/website-review-auto-insurance-quotes-%E2%80%93-how-to-shop/“ rel=”nofollow”>Website Review: Auto Insurance Quotes – How to Shop =-.

  8. NinaSay says:

    Yes, within the next 2 months we should be able to move out. We qualify for low income housing so we will be getting a really good price on a 3 bedroom apartment.

    It just feels like these 2 months are going to go by so slow!

  9. Brandy says:

    I agree it’s hard not having your own place. I wish I had my own place and a job but one comes with the other I suppose lol. But ((hugs)) I’m sorry you’re having a bad day.
    .-= Brandy´s last blog ..Cafepress Review and Giveaway =-.

  10. NinaSay says:

    Thanks so much! I agree, we have been waiting so long for DH to get a job. And it is such a big relief.

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